Hum A Few Bars, And I’ll Fake It

Gregory Kane at the Washington Examiner asks, Who knows the words to our national anthem?

Don’t they teach the “Star-Spangled Banner” in schools anymore? Apparently not. This past Sunday, just when I thought it was safe to watch my beloved Super Bowl again, there was singer Christine Aguilera, butchering our country’s national anthem.

I learned the words to “The Star-Spangled Banner” in the days before patriotism became a dirty word, and before the country went multicultural. Before my daughter moved to Berkeley, Calif., with her husband and my three grandchildren, the two younger ones – who double as my best pals ever – went to school in Baltimore County. I was miffed, but not surprised, to learn Baltimore County public schools had taught them more about the faux holiday Cinco de Mayo than about the real holiday known as the Fourth of July.

With the country going Mex and patriotism on the wane, it’s no wonder Aguilera muffed the words to the national anthem. So I can’t really blame her for the fiasco. The fault lies with our schools, and other parties.

Even Time Magazine, last seen inventing inane comparisons between Barack Obama and Ronald Reagan, found Aguilera’s performance wretched enough to garner 9th place on their list of the Top Ten Worst National Anthem Renditions:

Star-Mangled Performers:

At the risk of being charged with peddling vitriol that might incite the unstable or people with ears to mindless violence against their computers, I hereby present the Star Spangled Banner, as tattered and torn by the homicidal warbler Roseanne Barr, in the worst rendering in 197 years:

There oughta be a law.

About Bob Mack

Retired since 2003. Military Service: U.S. Army, 36th Artillery Group, Babenhausen, Germany 1966-67; 1st Signal Brigade, Republic of Vietnam, 1967-68 Attended University of Miami, 1969-73
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11 Responses to Hum A Few Bars, And I’ll Fake It

  1. samhenry says:

    I missed the super bowl and I hesitate to hear what Agulara (sp) did to the national anthem. It is so rarely played anymore. It is a disgrace. Happily in my village, the kids pledge allegiance to the flag mornings. That was written by a man who lives in the next village over. It is so true about patriotism – it’s like it’s now in the realm of sentimental old fools such a me and people too demented to be allowed to live. Are you old enough to remember when Kate Smith sang it? A local radio station used to play it each day at noon.

    • boudicabpi says:

      Hey Sam Henry,
      I wonder how many school children even know the pledge of allegiance? I question if Obama knows it as he certainly has not pledged allegiance to our flag or the nation for which it stands.
      Bob A.

  2. samhenry says:

    Actually, it was God Bless America for which she was best known. The vid above I think is someone pretending to be Kate.

  3. We homeschoolers know at least the first verse of our National Anthem. Knowing that verse perfectly is a course requirement in American Government class.

    When I was in a school (private, Christian), we learned all the verses of our National Anthem in 5th grade.

    • Bob Mack says:

      National pride is anathema to the We Are The World types that currently infest the governments of the West. But I notice that they’re not yet singing Kumbaya in the Middle East or China.

  4. there is no way on earth I’m gonna hit play on the Roseanne Bar vid, no way!

    Guess I’m young, I don’t know Kate Bush. Whoever that lady is that Sam Henry shared, well she knocked it out of the park. I love hearing it sung right.

    Even if Xtina Aguilera had gotten the words right, she still messed up the tune with her stupid runs. For the life of me I can’t figure out why they won’t just use a strong, lesser known singer to sing it straight up and old fashioned. Not even Xtina’s fans want to see her singing the Anthem anyway. They just want her to writhe around mostly neked and be “edgy.”

    cheers

  5. AFVET says:

    The absolute best rendition of the National Anthem I have ever heard was from Whitney Houston.
    I remember that my wife and I were awestruck after her performance.
    I haven’t heard anyone to date that would come close to her.
    Her range and delivery was exceptional.

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