Gregory Kane at the Washington Examiner asks, Who knows the words to our national anthem?
Don’t they teach the “Star-Spangled Banner” in schools anymore? Apparently not. This past Sunday, just when I thought it was safe to watch my beloved Super Bowl again, there was singer Christine Aguilera, butchering our country’s national anthem.
I learned the words to “The Star-Spangled Banner” in the days before patriotism became a dirty word, and before the country went multicultural. Before my daughter moved to Berkeley, Calif., with her husband and my three grandchildren, the two younger ones – who double as my best pals ever – went to school in Baltimore County. I was miffed, but not surprised, to learn Baltimore County public schools had taught them more about the faux holiday Cinco de Mayo than about the real holiday known as the Fourth of July.
With the country going Mex and patriotism on the wane, it’s no wonder Aguilera muffed the words to the national anthem. So I can’t really blame her for the fiasco. The fault lies with our schools, and other parties.
Even Time Magazine, last seen inventing inane comparisons between Barack Obama and Ronald Reagan, found Aguilera’s performance wretched enough to garner 9th place on their list of the Top Ten Worst National Anthem Renditions:
- Roseanne Barr
- Hockey Girl
- Chattanooga Police Officer
- Carl Lewis
- Anonymous, Enthusiastic Man
- R. Kelly
- Kat DeLuna
- Michael Bolton
- Christina Aguilera
- Hillary Clinton
At the risk of being charged with peddling vitriol that might incite the unstable or people with ears to mindless violence against their computers, I hereby present the Star Spangled Banner, as tattered and torn by the homicidal warbler Roseanne Barr, in the worst rendering in 197 years:
There oughta be a law.