I suppose we’ve got MTV and Slick Willie’s sax-blowing 1992 performance on the short-lived Arsenio Hall Show to blame for this now-permanent election year charade of Candidate as Hipster—God knows, it wasn’t Tricky Dick Nixon’s stiff-necked 1968 cameo (Sock-It-To-Me?) on Rowan & Martin’s Laugh-In. But when the voting age was lowered to 18, it was only a matter of time before opportunistic Democrats decided that the young were just another disaffected special interest group they could exploit. Back in the good old days, nobody gave a hoot what anyone under 30 thought.
Barack Obama, who’s spent the last week or so singing, dancing, telling jokes, and in general currying the callow student vote by promising them wagon loads of free spermicides and other goodies (well, free to them—somebody’s going to have to pay for ’em), appeared on Jimmy Fallon’s late-night dorm room shindig to do something called “slow-jamming” the news. How hip. How cool. How unbecoming the so-called leader of the Free World. El Rushbo elucidates:
“If you’re not hip, or if you have jobs where you have to get up in the morning and you don’t have the time to stay up late to watch meaningless drivel called late-night comedy TV, then you may not know what slow-jamming the news is. Slow-jamming the news is, in this case, is where Jimmy Fallon’s band, the studio orchestra — well, I wouldn’t call this bunch an orchestra. The combo, if you will, they play a slow R&B number in the background, like a Barry White song…
At any rate, you have the band and they’re doing this slow R&B number in the background while Fallon and his guests talk about serious subjects, like taxes, as best they can. Now, apparently it is supposed to be wildly funny if you have a low threshold for humor. It’s supposed to be uproariously funny if everything makes you laugh … It’s also funny if you smoke certain controlled substances, too.“
Freezing interest rates on student loans in exchange for student votes is the payola Obama is currently peddling to the precocious. But, as Lloyd Marcus wonders:
“…what the heck is the federal government doing running the student loan business anyway?”
Well, who else but Uncle Sam is going to guarantee the exorbitant tuition fees currently being extorted by these institutions of “higher” education, fees without which communist professors such as Billy Ayers or Angela Davis might find themselves lacking the means to support the comfortable bourgeois lifestyles to which they’ve become accustomed?
But, as the Daily News reminds us:
“then-Illinois Sen. Barack Obama missed two votes on the student loan interest bill that he now wants Congress to extend.”
When it comes to the incumbent, the current crop of university undergraduates might do well to remember one of the favorite slogans of their rowdy predecessors: “Never trust anyone over 30.”