Requiem For A Heavyweight: So Long Grumpy

Bugler_cartoon

Grumpy’s gone.

My friend Phil, aka Grumpy Elder, proprietor of Grumpy Opinions, father, veteran, patriot, blogger extrordinaire, and not grumpy at all, died yesterday morning.

I’ve become acquainted with many good people in cyberspace. Phil was one of ’em. Although I never met him personally, turned out we were brothers. We’d both spent time at Fort Jackson during the miserable winter of ’66 after the first large draft call for the Vietnam war. By telephone, we reminisced about Tent City, about meningitis outbreaks in the barracks, about cold, dead-of-night fire watches, and about those endless slogs up and down sandy Carolina tank trails. Later, we’d both shipped out to Germany and spent time wallowing in the mud during NATO training exercises at Grafenwohr. We’d shared so much, I felt as if I’d known the man for 50 years — besides, he liked my cartoons.

When we last spoke a few weeks ago, Phil never mentioned being in ill health. We rapped about Hillary’s e-mails, among other things, and how in our day, such egregious security violations as those committed by Missus C. would have, without much ado, landed the offender in a military dungeon somewhere. Phil told me one of his stories. I told him one of mine. He said I should do a post about it. So here it is:

In the winter of ’67, I was part of the communications section of a field artillery unit.  We were responsible for establishing encrypted com circuits between ourselves and headquarters during maneuvers, and for the receipt and decryption of classified and unclassified material both in the field and while ensconced on base.  That the army took this task seriously was evidenced by the fact that our personnel were authorized to carry loaded sidearms, rifles, and thermite grenades (to be used to melt down our equipment in case of any untenable situations).  Our field vehicle was a modified deuce and a half.  Our classified commo gear was packed inside in padded boxes, also classified (shape reveals function).  The interior of the van was classified. There was a lock on the inside and an Army Security Agency approved lock on the outside.  There was an authorized entry list.  Standing orders were to shoot anyone attempting to enter the van unless their name was on the list.  America didn’t kid around much in those days.

We played a lot of tag with the Soviets back then.  In the field, we often changed locations in order to elude any Russian spotters. After one such move, we pulled into a forest to bivouac, get the generators running and set up communications.  The ASA approved lock on the crypto van had frozen solid.  Since time was always of the essence, I didn’t have the luxury of waiting for a thaw.  I rustled up a bolt cutter and sheared that sucker off.   Once we’d run com wire into the van and hooked up the field phone, I contacted headquarters and requested a replacement. Our S2 (intelligence/security section), in it’s infinite wisdom, had not seen fit to outfit us with a spare.  Entered the call time and reason into my logbook.  Unpacked the com gear, established an encrypted circuit, and settled in.   Two days later, we received orders to move out.  The new lock had still not arrived, so I used my own combination lock to secure the van.  Back at the kaserne (barracks), I was summoned to the office of the S2 and informed that I was to be court-martialed for improper handling of classified material (negligence in securing the crypto van).  My lock, you see, had not been authorized for use by the security mavens at the ASA.  The notation in my logbook came to my rescue. Since the powers-that-be couldn’t court-martial me for their own incompetence, they decided to give me a commendation.  For displaying initiative. I don’t know what the moral of this little tale is, other than to always take notes, but Grumpy seemed to enjoy it.  I’m not sure that Hillary Clinton would.

I’m gonna miss Phil. A lot. Cyberspace is colder without him.  So is the real world.  Godspeed, my friend. I’ll see you when I see you.

PTG

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Veterans Day 2015

Vietnam

PTG

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The Last Progressive: A Cautionary Comic

The Last ProgressivePTG

Posted in Comics & Parodies, Democrats, Progressives | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Full Metal Straitjacket

Maggot

“It’s hard to find a worse example of Washington dysfunction than a Commander in Chief, backed by fellow Democrats, who is willing to punish the military so he can break the little fiscal discipline that Congress has … When it really counts, Democrats line up and salute, acting as an Obama protection-and-abetment racket above all other concerns.” (Obama Takes the Military Hostage)

After nearly 8 years of unbridled left-wing lunacy, what’s astounding is that people will still consider voting for Democrats instead of demanding that they be tossed into the nearest padded cell — a fate which, if you happen to honor the Constitution and Bill of Rights, is exactly what the leftists have planned for you:

DE Comics[…] the Obama (no)Justice Department has created a new domestic terrorism czar and whole department to battle the newest greatest threat — behind nonexistent global warming — to America: the white Christian male gun-owning liberty lover … And who defines what constitutes “anti-government and hate groups?” The notoriously pro-Marxist anti-American Southern Preposterous Lie Center (known in some circles as the Southern Poverty Law Center), which deems anyone who doesn’t embrace cultural Marxism and the latest social justice warrior cause du jour perversion as a hate group that should be “disappeared” into the bowels of the NDAA’s dungeons. (The American terrorist: White, Christian, owns guns and believes in liberty)

PTG

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The National Freak Show

The Night Owl

“The expressions of Secretary Clinton today are fascinating. One would not know the hearings involved 4 U.S. deaths.” — MSNBC host Joe Scarborough

FalseHillary Clinton testified before the House Benghazi Committee yesterday, and if they ever bring back the old TV show I’ve Got A Secret, she could appear on it for a month without running out of material.  Except one of the rules of the TV show was that the guest had to answer questions truthfully, a stipulation which would force the cackling Mrs. C. into a fast exit — stage left, of course.

Hillary Clinton presented one set of Benghazi facts to her own family; another to the family of the victims and the American public. Within hours of the Sept. 11, 2012 terrorist attacks in Benghazi, Clinton emailed her daughter, Chelsea, that Americans had died at the hands of an al-Qaeda like group …  Clinton also informed Egypt’s prime minister and Libya’s president that the attacks were “preplanned” and “had nothing to do with” an anti-Islamic video posted on YouTube. Yet Clinton told the American public and families of the Benghazi victims that the maker of the video was to blame for sparking protesters who got out of hand in Benghazi and spontaneously launched assaults. In fact, there had been no protests… (Sharyl Attkisson)

Democrats, who began their attempts to torpedo the investigation while the bodies were still warm in Benghazi, are supposedly concerned about the amount of tax dollars being spent by the House Committee.   This is a ruse, of course.  Since when has a Democrat ever been worried about spending someone else’s money?

Democratic members of the committee now have a spending tracker, similar to a debt clock, showing the investigation’s costs in real time. The clock showed the investigation has cost $4,809, 266 as of Thursday afternoon. The figure is more than $1 million less in taxpayer funds that were given to an accused con man to finance his condom inventions and studies into why the majority of lesbians are overweight. (Feds Have Spent More on Origami Condoms, Fat Lesbian Studies Than on Benghazi Committee)

To a modern Democrat, fat lesbians and purveyors of French ticklers will always be more deserving of your tax dollars than will the national security.  Theirs is not a political party any longer — it’s a national freak show.  Which is why the National Rifle Association is more popular than either the Democratic president or the top Democratic candidate for president:

 According to the poll, 58 percent of Americans have a favorable view of the gun rights organization, while only 35 percent have an unfavorable opinion of the group. In contrast, Obama’s most recent presidential approval rating is 46 percent. A majority of Americans, 50 percent, disapproves of the job he’s doing as president. A NBC/WSJ poll released earlier this week shows similar numbers for Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton. That poll found that 39 percent of voters have a positive view of Clinton, while 48 percent view her negatively. The continued vilification of the NRA by Democratic politicians seems to have had little impact on the gun group’s reputation, as the public’s opinion of the NRA remains relatively unchanged over the past decade. (Poll: The NRA Is More Popular Than Clinton, Obama)

Among people who retain a modicum of sanity, guns will always be more likable than Democrats.  They don’t misfire as much, and, unlike Democrats, having one at your side makes you less  likely to be robbed by strangers who believe that what’s yours is theirs — people like Obama and Hillary and Old B.S., dopes whose development has been arrested (and so should they).  These are politicians young at heart and soft in the head. As do all Democrats, they believe in “free stuff” like the candy and toys the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus used to bring ’em.  They believe that abortion is not murder, that Islam really is a religion of peace, and that folks who honor the U.S. Constitution should be checked for horns and tails.  They believe that deviance is diversity, that black lives matter more than others, and that the sea will swallow New York and Miami by noon tomorrow.  They believe in open borders and closed minds, that the Third World would have been First save for bad luck and capitalism, that schools should indoctrinate rather than educate, and that pedophiles deserve love too.  They have become, in short, unhinged.  They are the party of the determinedly deranged, and the modern Democratic mind is a weapon of mass destruction.

They need to be disarmed.

Liberal Fairy Tales

PTG

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Hats … Uh, Hijabs Off To Hillary!

Hijab Hillary

“An objective observer would have to conclude that former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and her partisans have obstructed justice from the moment jihadists attacked U.S. facilities in Benghazi, killing four Americans in September 2012 … The deliberate and years-long Obama-Clinton policy of turning the Middle East over to Islamic supremacists not only got four Americans killed in Benghazi. It continues to devastate the region and our national security interests there.” (Just the Truth, Mrs. Clinton)

Another day, another step closer to being fitted for an orange jump suit…

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PTG

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A Banquet Of Consequences

Gibbs 3

“If feels like you’re being played, you probably are.” — LeRoy Jethro Gibbs

“Sooner or later, we all sit down to a banquet of consequences.” — Robert Louis Stevenson

“Back in 2008, Obama supporters would foam at the mouth if you suggested Obama was a socialist. Today, progressive activists are positively giddy about Bernie Sanders who openly identifies as a Democratic Socialist. Now that the mask has come off, should the Democratic Party change its name?” (Democratic Socialist Party U.S.A.)

Red BernieYou’ve really got to hand it to the Jackasses.  After having their hats handed to them in two consecutive general elections, after watching their President’s rolling two-year approval rating sink faster than a cement-shod Mafia informer in a Jersey marsh, they’ve decided that what America wants most is more socialism.   Well, I once knew a gent who had to dunk his tea bag exactly 71 times before he could take a drink.  He couldn’t not do it.  If he lost count, his anxiety would kick in, and he’d toss the contents of his cup down the drain and start boiling more water. He’d have understood Democrats perfectly.  Their candidates have to be pinker than undercooked roosters otherwise the ants in their skulls begin to crawl.   If they weren’t such a pack of hypocritical gasbags you’d almost have to feel sorry for ’em.  They’re afflicted, after all.

But it’s hard to feel sorry for progressives like Bernie the Bolshevik or the cackling Mrs. Clinton.  As I wrote last year in a bit titledThe Decline and Fall of the Arkansas Battleaxe

Camp CackleHillary’s major attributes have always been a vindictive nature, a foul mouth, a ruthless disregard for the U.S. Constitution, and a dearth of testicles. The latter qualifies her only as the standard bearer for America’s disgruntled legions of lesbians and feminists, while the former identifies her as a modern Democrat. Come to think of it, so does the latter.

Bernie Sanders Drinking GameAnd Bernie?  Well, he’s not quite in the red, pardon the pun:

We estimate Bernie Sanders’ net worth at $528,014, which is 7.8 times larger than the net worth of the median American family. However, since all senator net worths are estimates, it’s possible Bernie Sanders’ net worth is much lower. In fact, Bernie Sanders’ net worth could be as low as $222,026 which is 3.3 times larger than the net worth of the median American family.

Half a mil or so’s not bad for any commie not named Fidel, although it’s chicken feed compared to the boodle in Hillary’s closet:

What Hillary Clinton and her husband, Bill, pay in local property taxes on two luxury homes ($104,303) is twice the income of an average family. She earns more for a 20-minute speech to an industry trade group than a dozen fast-food workers make in a year. Her book royalties last year brought in $5 million, part of the couple’s $30.5 million in income … Her net worth is $32,015,000.  Last summer, Hillary Clinton decried the “cancer of inequality” while promoting her book Hard Choices–for which she snagged a $14 million advance.

When it comes to sharing the wealth, political progs like Bernie and Hillary should start with their own.

PTG

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Democrats Debate, But No One’s Ready For Primetime

Dems

[Hillary] claimed to be an outsider because she’s a woman. She claimed that being a woman is what makes her different than Obama. If you hated a man stealing all your money and taking away all your civil rights, get ready for some real political change now that a woman is going to do it.” Daniel Greenfield

“There is no clearer attack on Capitalism than what we saw in the Democratic debate and the subsequent accolades from the media.” Sara Noble

“Insanity in individuals is something rare – but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule.” Friedrich Nietzsche

They should’ve held the first Democratic squawkfest of 2015 in Havana or Hanoi rather than Las Vegas. The Cubans and the Vietnamese would at least have been familiar with the rhetoric. Our national press corps, the majority of whom demonstrated their Americanism by sitting on their hands during the singing of the National Anthem, reacted as if the rehashing of the Communist manifesto by the likes of Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton was the greatest innovation since the self-basting turkey: 

Progressive policies and ideals won the night according to the Progressives and their media friends at NBC … They touted the “authenticity” of the aged communist who euphemistically calls himself a Democratic Socialist … MSNBC, like most of the Democratic media outlets, which is almost all the media outlets, declared Hillary the winner and lauded her “big bear hug” to Progressivism. Outside of not falling on her face or cackling too loudly, what did she do that was so remarkable during this debate where none of her “opponents” challenged her seriously and where Bernie Sanders helped her by discrediting the FBI investigation of her emails and blaming it on Republicans? … The Democratic party is almost unrecognizable from what it was seven years ago. They do not stand for any American values... (We Could Be Living Through the LAST DAYS of CAPITALISM)

Demonstrating their normal civic concern, more Americans watched the fourth episode of NCIS than CNN’s offering of Progressives On Parade.  Well, if it wasn’t for determined inattention, no Democrat would ever win an election.  Don’t forget, this is the party that once booed God.  And these are candidates who shouldn’t be allowed out of the attic without adult supervision, let alone run for President of the United States:

Two freaks would be two too few for a Democratic debate. Standing next to Hillary was the animated wax figure of Martin O’Malley putting on a very convincing imitation of a human being … Every time his unnaturally white teeth shone, moths flew into his mouth … The horror continued with Lincoln Chafee, a man whose only purpose in coming to the debate was to take home the prize of the worst political candidate on this stage and on every stage in history … Amid this nonsense, Jim Webb broke in with occasional outbursts of common sense … Webb modestly declared that he was the “most qualified person standing here to be commander in chief”. Sadly, he was right. Not because he’s a great candidate, but because he’s a throwback to an earlier Democratic Party whose candidates could discuss serious issues like adults. That’s not the Democratic Party of today, which isn’t just radical, but also unserious … Democrats learned that they could vote for Hillary because she’s a woman, vote for Bernie Sanders to stop the government from putting potheads in jail, vote for O’Malley because he used a dozen Crest whitening strips on his teeth or vote for Lincoln Chafee because he’s a block of granite. They could vote for Jim Webb, but he’s disqualified because he can find Syria on a map. (Thieves, Liars and Idiots: The Two Hour Democratic Debate: A night the Democratic Party should be ashamed of)

Are any of these clowns really electable? Who knows?  After all, any country that installed the likes of Barack Obama twice should probably measure at least half its citizens for space in the nearest nuthouse. 

    Related stories:

PTG

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Obama’s All Wet On Climate Change

Obama's War On The Weather

“When challenged by “60 Minutes” interviewer Steve Kroft about ceding leadership in the Middle East to Putin, Obama argued that leadership on climate change was more important than leadership to combat terrorism.” Breitbart

Schlindler TweetObama’s response to Steve Kroft was massively inane but totally predictable, given that some of the Radical-In-Chief’s best friends are unrepentant communist revolutionaries from the infamous ’60s terrorist group known ironically as “Weatherman.”  And since any individual of average imbecility knows that you can’t change the weather (or the mindset of your average radical), Obama’s battle against the elements must be seen for what it really is. It’s not the climate he wants to fundamentally transform — it’s Western young-obama-comixcivilization.  It’s the same nefarious anti-capitalist ideology he’s been pushing since he was a young Leninist in California.  To Statists like Obama, freedom’s just another word for doing what they say.

Obama as president has never allowed much dissent to creep into his discussions with aides about anything. This has led to failures all over the board in domestic and foreign policy and the appearance of the U.S. sleepwalking our way to disaster. It’s not going to get any better… (Foreign policy realists in the White House decry ‘weakness and indecision’)

In fact, all of Obama’s … uh, policies seem to be the result of late-night dorm room bull sessions  conducted jointly by hippie Marxist stoners, homosexual film students, and the high command of the Muslim Brotherhood.   Is it any wonder that the Russians are laughing all the way to Damascus?

the-big-red-onesRelated stories:

PTG

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A Brief History Of How We Got To Now

Dyan Sings IBMA History Lesson

Run Its Course2Cartoon by Rand Holmes

PTG

Posted in Cartoons, Memoirs, Opinion | Tagged , , , , , | 3 Comments